Its a beautiful thing when my clients bring me examples of how they overcome hurdles when their minds quieten. As soon as people learn about how the mind works; it’s true nature, then some of the things which seemed like ‘mountains’ in the past look more like ‘molehills’.
Recently I was listening deeply to a client who historically has found life very challenging, feeling like he has to put enormous effort into anything where results are required. My client has been struggling for a long time, trying to gain a promotion in the workplace without success. Each time he has concluded that what is required of him eludes him, that he just hasn’t got what his superiors are looking for. He struggles within the interview space, believing that he is required to act and speak in a particular way and give examples of competence that he somehow just can’t articulate.
A question arises in my mind, wondering how it is that he can’t just be himself, just as he is when he sits with me in what I love to call a ‘ compassionate conversation for wellbeing’. It felt right, recently, to share this thought gently with my client, to ask him what it would be like to simply be who he is, to relax back into his true nature and allow his bosses to experience him in his natural state . He shared with me that he is convinced, adamant, that this is not what they want. ‘They have a particular agenda, a formula that they require, but I just don’t know how to give them what they want’.
I found myself wanting in some ways to argue with him and try to convince him that maybe this isn’t how it is and that maybe he could use our meetings as a model for his interviews, given that he feels he can be totally who he is when he is in my company (although in the past he has felt with traditional counselling that the exchange needed to unfold in a particular way). Instinctively I know that this is not the way forward. This rising feeling lacked the gentleness of the earlier instinct to simply ask if he could be himself. There is no need to convince my client how to proceed. I know, without a shadow of a doubt that my clients have everything they need within them to proceed in just the right way when their minds quieten and their natural wisdom arises from a deeper place within.
Within this recent session I sat quietly with this intuitive knowing, observing my client with deep love and respect. There was no need to say a thing. Deep listening was all that was needed.
Suddenly the atmosphere in the room felt so different. My client’s eyes brightened and a smile emerged on his face. Suddenly, he changed gear and shared with me how effortlessly he lost a large amount of weight. ‘ I dropped from 22 stone, down to 11 without any trying. No particular diet.
I asked my client how this happened. ‘ I just did it’ he shared. ‘One day I just knew that I felt very different about my body and about food, and then effortlessly the weight started to drop off. It took 3 years, but it was so easy’. In the past diets had felt like an impossible project.
An insight had arisen for is young man. A simple definition of an insight is ‘sight from within’. In the midst of this particular struggle, my client’s mind had fallen quiet when he experienced deep listening, which is a form of love. In this kindly environment a deep sense of how easy life is when we simply ‘go with the flow’ and know that we are at one with the universe.
By the end of the session my client had sensed deeply, had SEEN and that maybe he could allow life to unfold in other situations. That he could rely on his true nature to get him through difficult circumstances. I have every confidence that the issue my client has been struggling with has potential to unfold in a much more gentle way.
If you would like to engage with me in a compassionate conversation for wellbeing, please don’t hesitate to contact me.